In-Law Relations

This image belongs to church of jesus christ

In the families there are rules that the members have imposed, these are not necessarily consensual or spoken rules, they are implicit rules, rules that are not verbal, but all the members comply with them, from ways of behaving, ways of understanding life, relating, economic areas such as the use of money, debt and consumption, in my family I have seen a saving environment, put each currency in a bank, limit spending such as not eating out in restaurants, not buying very luxurious things, limit going to cinema, buy in cheap food markets, avoid debt as possible, not lend money, only in case of emergency, are rules that have been imposed from the example of my mother as well as stories, stories and comments on different issues , that one as a child was assimilating and putting into practice in his life. Another one of the rules that have been imposed in my home I can summarize just like President Benson said: It allows us to learn and be instructed to correct our mistakes (see D & C 1: 25-26), and that we regret and let us seek restitution to correct sin (see D & C 1: 27-28).

Here are some recommendations on how we can put into practice these principles that have been learned at home:

• Pray in all moments
• Be patient and recognize that family members need time to build resilience since mistakes and failures are opportunities to learn.
• Allow natural and logical consequences to be those that impart discipline.
• Respect the decisions of family members, even when their bad decisions lead them to lose privileges and refrain from recriminating their children for breaking the rules.
• Do not be the cause for them to stop trying because they criticize them severely.
• Instead of praising them for an achievement, encourage and praise the effort made.
• "Praise your children more than they correct them. Praise them for even their smallest achievements "(see President Ezra Taft Benson, 1899-1994," The honorable place of women, "Liahona, April 1982, 76)

These are principles that I have learned in my family when it comes to the upbringing of children, although I have not yet married is what I hope to achieve in my marriage, so it is important to know the rules that exist in couples because they do not indicate which is the most important thing for them, that will avoid many of the fights that could happen. The family extends in marriage, the parents of the husband and the parents of the wife come together to form a relationship, each of them with their realities, customs and rules, must reach a point in balance between the relationship of the two families, it is important to fortify a healthy and friendly relationship, but it is also necessary to generate a family between the spouses with their own customs and rules, establishing a relationship is difficult because it takes time, effort and dedication, but if they want to maintain a healthy and calm environment it is It is necessary to avoid the triangulation that is created when the communication builds a stronger relationship with the father than with the spouse, or excludes the spouse, and must have regular contact and communication with the in-laws also sends messages that couples value their relationship with they. Frequency of contact and communication that does not interfere with each other. being the first in marriage are important steps in establishing relationships with in-laws (James M. Harper and Susanne Frost Olsen, creating healthy ties with in-laws and extended families)